5 things I’ve learned as a musician
Summer of 2004. Ronald Reagan just took a dirt nap. The USA is invading Iraq. A couple months previous, Justin Timberlake exposed Janet Jacksons breast to millions of viewers during the Super Bowl. I was eight years old and I was on my way to my first saxophone lesson.
I grew up in an extremely musical family. It started with my grandfather on my dad’s side, he was a trombonist for the Glenn Miller Orchestra. He married my grandmother, a violist and music school drop out (ironically enough I’m typing this on what would be her 91st birthday - happy heavenly birthday nana I hope I’m making you proud with dropping out of music school as well and being chaotic in my everyday life!)
Together they had my dad; where most of of my musical background comes from. My father was born and raised in Los Angeles and has played trumpet since he was 5 years old. He’s toured the world with Barry White and the Love Unlimited Orchestra and then Jimmy Witherspoon. His group, the metropolitan boptet was one of the first groups that India Arie got to perform with in LA and he still keeps in contact with her. My earliest memories are sitting at a piano with my dad and him teaching me the fundamentals of music. Washoe County School District in Reno, Nevada did not have a big emphasize on the importance of arts or music, so my dad filled in where they let off. When I was 8 and able to hold an instrument, it was either the trumpet or the saxophone. He had an old Conn Shooting Star alto saxophone laying around and I decided that I wanted to play that.
From that moment of deciding what instrument I wanted to play, I started to try and build my own identity as a musician. I knew I wanted to be a musician, I enjoyed it and I understood it and picked it up quickly. But maintaining my own identity and style would be something I would struggle with to this very day. Being a woman in the music industry is hard enough, but when you’re living in the shadows of your insanely talented relatives, it gets hard. When I studied music in college it came to an ugly head when I lost myself and tried to end things bc i was struggling with my identity. Not only was I just a trumpet player’s daughter - but a university musician. I didn’t want to compose, practice or anything. It was all for other people and not myself. There’s a lot I learned from that moment I tried to end it. I’ve come back and I’m still trying to find my identity. And that’s something that a lot of musicians struggle with and it’s not talked about enough.
1. Remember why you are playing music
It’s easier said than done, but at the end of the day you are playing music and performing for yourself first. As you develop your sound and technique, do what is comfortable for you (yes have good posture and embouchure because that can actually damage you and hurt you.) Especially after many years of lessons, festivals, rehearsals, screaming matches.. it’s easy to get lost. When you are a long time player you lose track on who this is all for. At the end of the day it’s you. YOU have spent years practicing and perfecting your craft; not your teachers, professors or private instructors. Make a beautiful sound, or just a sound in general to make yourself feel some sense of satisfaction. Not everyone can play a Bb (in tune) on a clarinet or hold out an altissimo G. Give yourself some credit. This is all for you, not your parents or professors. Make your brain happy.
2. DO not get flustered over playing something wrong. Practice smart!
God dammit I played a B natural in a C7 chord for the 80th time nothing ever works I am a failure WHY am I still playing this I can’t do it I’m gonna quit ANGER RUN IN SENTENCE OF ANGER!
Stop. Take a breath. Go for a walk. Drink water. Play a video game. Meditate! When you are constantly practicing a passage and playing it wrong, give yourself time to walk away. You do not have to grind in as many takes as you can in your practice session, there is just as much value in walking away as running the piece again. You practice the mistakes, they’re gonna happen. Give your brain time to reset and get it under your fingers. Slow it down. Stop in between each note and reset your fingers so you build your dexterity. Listen to the intervals so you’re playing them in tune. Sing your part if you’re an instrumentalist. Make it sound good and stylistically how you want, but give yourself time to analyze and make a plan on how it will come to fruition. BREATHE!
3. Yes practice, but give yourself time to relax and reflect
Practicing is the only way to get better.. partially true. Smart practicing is the way to get better results. Make a plan for what you are going to practice. Scales? Etudes? Plan a focused practice, but also plan a break. We all cannot be Charlie Parker and practice 15 hours a day. Your work ethic will not suffer if you only practice for half an hour on Tuesday and relax the rest of the night. If you don’t give yourself adequate time to reset and recharge, you’re going to spin your wheels. There is no shame in sitting in silence and reflecting on yourself and your music. You are not a machine that was put on this planet for the sole purpose of making music to get a grade or bring honor to your family’s name. Relax. Play smarter, not harder.
4. Music academia is hard on everyone, do not beat yourself up
This is the big one right here that isn’t talked about enough. Playing on behalf of a group, University or band leader for years on end takes a heavy toll on you. It comes to a point where you are introduced “under the direction of” or “on behalf of the university” “dr. *insert name*’s student” or my favorite “oh hey you are Scott’s daughter!” Your identity is lost. Mine was. I dropped out of music school after studying classical and jazz and had no idea what I wanted to play. I loved playing both styles, but I never got a gig for just myself. It was always for my dad’s groups or the university. It really left me kind of stranded. I joined an experimental noise group after I dropped out, that wasn’t it. I was under SO much pressure in school I got ahold of some pills and got into a bit of a bad habit. Everyone wanted me to be perfect, every professor wanted to brag about me. And I always got told I didn’t have time for the music I wanted to do because I had to play for school. Doing a jazz and classical rout was hard. I was in 3 jazz groups, 2 classical, private jazz AND classical lessons. It was a lot. And each professor thought they had the most important class and gave out the work to match it. I was burnt out. And that was before the pandemic, this past year I witnessed my boyfriend go through the same thing (I love you honey this is for you) and destroy his mental health. It’s an honor to play in university because you get to do music all day and not deal with customer service, but the work load is insurmountable. The music feels political and not fun anymore. It shouldn’t be like that. Don’t let music school take away your power. YOU are the musician, they should be thankful to have YOU and your money. Your talents are bringing them the recognition, not the other way around. Don’t let anyone take your power away. You are a great musician. After college, I stopped playing for a few years and picked up comedy. But back in mid 2019 I picked it back up and have been able to fulfill my musical dreams and make hip hop music. Don’t lose yourself. It won’t be like this forever. Tell your professor you need a mental health day and take a break.
5. Your best music will come from living life
“Music is your own experience, your thoughts, your wisdom. If you don't live it, it won't come out of your horn. They teach you that music has boundaries. But, man, there's no boundary line to art.” -Charlie Parker.
That is my favorite quote of all time. The world is huge. There are a million different things to experience and learn from. Music comes from within and your interpretation on life. Don’t be afraid to go out and live and have that be a reflection on your sound. Be confident in yourself and who you are as a person. You are more than someone’s kid, someone’s student. You are a living vessel that has the incredible capability to make something beautiful. Sound is subjective. What may sound like garbage to one person, may be the most beautiful thing to someone else. Be confident in your playing. Be confident in your adventures. Don’t let anyone tell you other wise.
By Noel Maureen
