Why gay is yay!
Why Gay is Yay!
I love being a member of the LGBTQ community. I think we are remarkable. If you are member of the LGBTQ community, I want to talk to you about one reason why LGBTQ people are so awesome.
Have you ever wondered why the LGBTQ crew is forward thinking, innovative, trendsetters, high achievers, with a great sense of empathy and compassion?
I thought about this. The answer is: Necessity is the mother of invention!
I don’t know if you know this, but I grew up in poverty. I was raised by my single grandmother in San Francisco before it was a pretty city. We ate blocks of government cheese. Once they got stale, I would use them as door stops, and science projects.The lab rats never went for it!
Anyway…
I often joke that if I were a straight guy, I would have killed with the women at the Korean Baptist Church. What I mean when I say this joke is that, I probably would have grown up following expectations of my family which would have been to be straight, very Christian, with a good job and a home on a culdesac. Aka a ‘normal life.’ All of this was what was expected of me. There is nothing wrong with any of this. It’s a perfect, legitimate lifestyle. However, it was an option that was not available and appropriate for me. There are all kinds of folks who line up with this life because it’s easy. But there is a difference between choosing the life above and having that life put on you because it’s expected of you. It’s an easy trap to fall into, but I physiologically and emotionally could not.
I can’t be straight because I am gay. But if you are straight be straight. You honor who you are. You want to, live in a culdesac with a white picket fence around your house and a St. Bernard in the yard. And 2.5 kids. Great. But is that choice right for you?
Gay people have to confront this question really early.
Unfortunately, so many of us are born into a situation where we must comply with our family’s expectations and society too.
Sometimes we live in ways that we might not necessarily choose because it is the way to live.
This is where being gay gives us a huge advantage. Being gay, is biological. We CANNOT be “normal” if we genuinely tried.
Some of us can override our gayness better than others to fit in, for a while. But sexuality is very difficult to overcome.
Straight men, I want you to do an exercise for me. Imagine if you had to pretend to like ‘dick’. Really. Imagine sucking a penis. You would gag. I mean literally and figuratively. I talked to my lesbian friends who have had to do this too, and they are not thrilled either.
Most of you if you are reading this is aware enough to know gay people don’t choose to be gay. It’s a biological thing.
If you think we choose to be gay, if you think there’s something weird about that, you are probably not at a point of being aware that being gay is not a choice.
When you don’t fit in with 90 percent of the population and you don’t fit in with the social expectations of marriage with 2.5 kids, you have to create your own path.
Acquiescing to a life presented to us is not really an option. We need to be forward thinkers. If we have any chance of being happy, it’s either completely kill off that side of us and deny it, which some people do. It never ends well…
We LGBTQ people have to take charge of our lives. We must create family, sometimes a chosen family. We create our own culture, our own norms, our own way of dressing. We really have to actively create what we want.
Because we do not ‘fit in’ some ways, the world is an empty canvas for many of us. At birth, we’re given a coloring book to color, and must color in the lines. With gay people, it’s like we are given huge markers that can’t fit in the lines. So we get a bigger piece of paper, and make our own lines. I think there is a beauty in that which allows us to be examples of people who create their own destinies.
Many people look up to the members of the LGBTQ community; for being ourselves, so boldly. A lot of times being bold is a necessity. Be bold or line up with a life that no matter how hard we trie to line up with, we weren’t able to.
What am I saying? I would sincerely love for everyone to start questioning what it is that we really want. Before just lining up with whatever is given to us because it’s easy or expected. The joy that I have fortunately discovered in having to create my own path is incredibly rewarding!
So I want to take some time this week to honor my LGBTQ brothers and sisters. I recognize the bravery and creativity in you. And your boldness has undoubtedly changed the world for the better not just for the LGBTQ community but for the world!
Everyone should be so bold as to question what they want and bravely line up with it.
